Thoughts...

I was sat in the garden at work last night. I was just finishing my cigarette when I noticed the moon was very low in the sky and was bright, almost luminous orange. I sat quite bemused for a few moments when I had a true revelation, a real spiritual enlightenment. Now, I know most of you reading this will immediately switch off, or you'll have read about recent events in my life in the bit below and be thinking "He's lost the bloody plot", or "He's finally cracked with the stress of things", but that simply isn't true.

I suddenly realised that true spirituality isn't found in any God, or any religion- any truly benevolent, forgiving God wouldn't care how or when you worshipped it, just so long as you do. Therefore ALL religions, be they Christianity, Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, Sikhism, even Satanism are meaningless. After all, how could a loving God approve of any religion that preaches that if you don't worship God the way they dictate then you'll go to hell. And the Catholic church is by far the worst. If you don't recieve the Last rites before you die you go to hell? What utter bullshit! That is just a mechanism invented by those corrupt fuckers so that they're on the spot if you decide to leave your estate to the church. What a bunch of total and utter c*nts. And making an excuse for those poor kids in regions of the world who haven't heard of catholicism by saying they go into Limbo so that everyone else can pray for their souls? What a load of cock.

I'm no fan of the Catholic Church. I don't understand how the biggest private landowner in the world can have the balls to send round a collection plate on a Sunday to pay for church roof repairs or to feed starving kids in Africa. Pay for it yourselves you bloated, corrupt bunch of bastards!!! The Catholic Church also has indellible links to the Mafia and the Masons. Just ask Roberto Calvi. Oh wait you can't- he was found hanging under Greyfriar's Bridge in London with his tongue cut out after losing loads of the vatican's money in disastrous stock ventures. He was known as god's Banker. I guess that's a bit more literal than he ever intended now.

Christianity preaches belifs that are just plain wrong. Jesus never claimed to be the Son of God after all. When Pontius Pilate asked him if he believed he was the son of God he replied that he was the son of man. Well, fuck me, there's a bit of a difference there don't you think? Bloody hell, I'm the son of man too. Every male human being on the planet is the son of man, just as surely as every female is the daughter of man (or woman for that matter). It's just all a load of bullshit which is designed to keep us from finding our own true spirituality within ourselves. "And why do they want to do this?" I hear absolutely nobody whatsoever asking because you've all got bored and gone to make a cup of tea, have a beer or have a wank. It's simple. Because if we start to see religion for the transparent load of utter bollocks it really is then their evil empires will crumble, both financially and physically. Not only that, but if we start to question religion that much, then the code of laws that are based on those religions will also surely become questionable. And in turn the Governmental systems that create those laws will also come into question. Can you see a theme
starting to develop here?

If we all start to recognise the true spirituality within ourselves we start to break free of the chains that others have cast upon us. We become true individuals, and free spirits. And no Government in the world wants that. Ever.

Bummed Out

A few weeks ago a very close friend of mine passed away. I had known him for 11 years and had worked as his keyworker for the last six. Now, I know some people will say "Well, as his carer you're supposed to be professional and not get too involved". What a load of bollocks. I defy anyone who has had a vested interest in the welfare of another person for that long not to get involved. If I didn't get involved I wouldn't be doing my job properly. End of arguement.
Now, my friend had no family. His face was a mask of scar-tissue, a testament to falls and the epileptic seizures he suffered from right up until the day he died. And yet, he was the most polite, well-mannered and genuinely charming person I've ever met.
It's been very hard for me personally. It's been like losing a member of the family. I'm very deflated at the moment. I also feel guilty because I feel that I should be stronger, not just in myself, but for my colleagues aswell. They felt his death very hard too. I guess I'm just rambling now, but I had to give some explanation about the way I'm feeling, aswell as why I hadn't updated this blog for a while. I'd like to think he's somewhere special now, somewhere where he doesn't need his wheelchair, or a barrow-load of tablets every day just to keep him alive. He deserves that, at the very least.
K. B. 03/03/53 - 23/08/05